“Should I, or should I not?”
At some point in life, almost all of us have had to face a version of the question: “Should I do X or Y?”
For instance, months ago, I faced the question of whether I should relocate to another continent. To create the life I always dreamed for, the first step was to make a great decision regarding to what, where and who to do it with. And I had no idea how to make a great decision.
Often, what we see in the world is either an Overly Rational or Overly Instinctual decision-making process.
The overly rational tend to create long lists of pros and cons and engage in head-based analysis. This often leads to getting stuck in a loop and replaying the “what ifs” about the different options repeatedly. While this approach doesn’t lead to rash, inconsiderate actions, the prolonged indecisiveness that often goes along with it can be painful.
The overly instinctual don’t really stop to think, but instead just move into action. While this approach leads to an outcome more quickly and doesn’t include a prolonged period of indecisiveness, the consequences of the chosen path of action are not thought out. This is perfectly appropriate for a small child, but not for an adult.
The main reason underneath these two unbalanced approaches is that most of us have never learned how to consider different perspectives at the same time. As a result, people think that they either need to let their heads or their instincts make the decision.
What’s a better approach for coming to a decision?
By Bere Blissenbach
Career Coach, writer, Law PhD.