• EB

How to Reduce Stress and Frustration


Learning how to handle stress provide a productive and happier life. Extreme levels of negative stress can literary kill us. I say negative stress because a certain amount of stress is necessary. The only people who have no stress are six feet under the earth.

Stress helps us grow. A certain amount of pressure is healthy and can bring out the best of us. The problem is that our present-day society has taken the stress to dangerous levels. Our fast-paced lives, job pressures, the environment, our less-than-ideal diet and lifestyles, all lead to an excess of stress in most of us.

If we want to learn to live healthier, to listen to your heart, and to be successful, we must find ways to cope with the stress. Meditation, hobbies, exercise, yoga, nature walks, friends, family and even pets help us manage our daily stress. The local bookstore provides many books about how to deal with stress in detail. But, we all are different, what works for me may not be ideal for you, so find the activity that can work for you to get rid of the stress.

Personally, when I feel stress dominating my thoughts I start taking long and deep breaths. But better efficacy in reducing stress I receive when I sit quietly for a few minutes every day, especially before going to sleep and before getting up from the bed.

The productivity gets increased tremendously by simply replacing the words "ought" and "should" with things that we really love to do. Certainly, skipping the daily news, which is full of negative events, is the only “ought” in my daily life.

Another way I found to reduce stress is to live with integrity. Our beliefs, values, and commitments - our inner realities - are all obviously reflected in our outside life so, hiding behind them make no sense. Authenticity, accepting myself as I'm and working to improve it has brought peace in my daily life.

It is intellectually and emotionally exhausting to live without integrity. If who we are on the inside is not congruent with how we behave on the outside is very stressful!

Imagine that you are standing on a river, with each of your feet in a different boat. One boat represents your values, and the other represents your behaviour. You start floating down the river. As long as the two boats remain close together, you're fine. But when one starts to drift farther away from the other, it becomes difficult to straddle both crafts. The farther apart the two boats get, the harder it will be for you to keep a foot in each until, at one point, the two boats become too distanced from one another, and you fall into the water.

The farther your own behaviour drifts from your values, the more difficult it will become for you to function happily each day, and the more internal anxiety you'll experience. You will have to stretch too far to stay psychologically and spiritually afloat. At some point, your system will just break down. This situation takes the form of physical illness, mental stress or collapse and emotional turmoil.

How about, not settling for less than we deserve in our relationships, is this a way of living with integrity?

How about asking for what we want and need from others or speaking our truth, even though it might create conflict or tension?

How about making choices based on what we believe, and not on what others believe? Oh God, this is a difficult choice, especially if you believe that he loves you, but his behaviour is giving you a hard time.

Lack of money brings real pain. An important ingredient for well-being is to know how to handle financial pressure. Knowing how to earn, to save and to give is a big issue in extreme self-care.

Get over the nonsense of excuses such as: "I don't have a head for finances" or "That's my partner's job" or "I don't have enough to think about investing."

Just remember, it's our responsibility to be in control of our life, and that includes our money.


2017 Elira Bregu Los Angeles CA USA